Love Language: Friendship

The category of "Friendship":

a. Spending time together.
Love can be expressed by spending "quality" time together. That means 1)doing something you both enjoy doing and 2) doing something that enables you to communicate while doing it. Doing (especially) relaxing activity together is quite important. Doing common work tasks bonds you together, but provides less communication. Above all, show your spouse that time with him or her has priority in your life. See Swihart, pp. 35-40.

b. Sharing worlds and responsibilities.
Love can be expressed through showing supportive loyalty for, as well as interest and pride in, the work worlds of your spouse. The man must show the same support and help for the woman in her responsibilities as she must in his. It may entail the man changing diapers or helping with the sweeping without being asked. See Wheat, pp. 187-190, "A Creative View of Sharing". See Swihart, pp. 27-34.

c. Becoming of one mind.
Love can be expressed by sharing each others' mental world. Reading books together (even aloud), discussing changes in one's thinking, studying a subject together--all these are included. The couple must develop a "practical oneness" about their lifestyle and philosophy of childrearing, and so on.

d. Creating a climate of trust.
Love can be expressed through both listening and opening up to the other. Friendship is above all a relationship in which it is safe to share fears, hurts, and weaknesses--an emotional refuge. Listening takes concentration. Some people are good at listening but not at opening up themselves, and vica versa. Trust is also built by following through on commitments, being reliable. See Wheat, pp. 96-117, "The Gift of Belonging". See Swihart, pp. 41-48.

Taken from Love & Love Language by Tim Keller;
Ed Wheat, The Love Life.
Judson Swihart, How Do You Say, ‘I Love You’?